Overcome your Fears June 21, 2016 – Posted in: Blog – Tags: confidence, contest, designer, fashion, glam, happy, honesty, LA DESIGNER, los angeles, me, model, personal, positive, runway, short, shy, writing
Hope everyone is having a great week so far 😉
This week’s blog is going to be a little more personal and I wanted to share some of my past with you.
I’ve mentioned before I started designing at a really young age, but I want to talk about my beginnings and where I started in my fashion career. When I was young, I was insanely shy. I felt like I had a lot to express when I was at a young age, and being shy was my barrier. I really wanted to do something about it, so when I was 17-years-old I signed up for an etiquette class to help me break out of my shell.
I went to these classes twice a week where they taught me manners, how to communicate, how to speak in public, how to eat, and even how to walk. The way we walk has a lot to do with fashion; it teaches you posture and the energy you should have when you walk. Being able to walk in runway is a talent, you’re either born with it or you’re not. I suppose I had that talent when my teacher brought it up to me.
There was a competition in my city for petite models. Being 5”1, I definitely qualify: I’m a short woman! My teacher Manuella and some classmates signed me up for the contest. When I showed up to this competition they asked me “why are you here? What do you want to accomplish?” I told them I just wanted to overcome my shyness and feel more confident.
I never in my life felt so connected with what was happening backstage. People getting dolled up, the lights, music preparation, and the overall energy behind the scenes was thrilling.
Of course I doubted myself, I was really self-conscience about my height! Going through this contest while being completely out of my comfort zone and doing something different was something that helped my confidence. I ended up winning the contest for best runway! I also went to the second round where winners from different cities competed against each other and eventually won the Model Petite Baja California ’97. I learned I loved being behind the scenes of runway. Right after winning, I even got to display my designs in events like this during the interim of fashion runway shows. I learned modeling wasn’t for me, but being a fashion designer was.
I learned pushing yourself and taking a risk could help you be more confident and help you achieve where you want to be.
Sometimes we doubt ourselves about doing things, but you just have to remember and notice the people surrounding you cheering and rooting for you. There are people that support you!
I can relate to this 20 years later. There are some people that believe in me more than I believe in myself. Pay attention to those people, because sometimes when you’re by yourself you won’t make any actions. Surround yourself with people that see you bigger than how you see yourself. Another element I want you to realize is follow your intuition. I knew taking etiquette classes was something I had to do as my first step to being more confident.
This is all the base of who I am today. My fashion, traveling to different countries, pursuing designs and overall creating my brand has basically started from me believing in myself and knowing I could do it.
Everything starts in you. Make the first step to pursue whatever you want to do and listen to the voices cheering you on. I want you to have confidence! Start making the first step in doing what you want to do, and surround yourself with positive people. Be careful whom you pick for friends, and pay attention to what they tell you. Do they believe in you? Do they support you? If they’re not telling you these things, don’t listen to them. They will only bring you down.
One of the most important tips I can tell you about building confidence is to start writing in a journal everyday. Pay attention to what you write and always be honest. When you read what you write, you’ll start to have an idea on why you feel the way you feel.
Thoughts create feelings, and feelings create actions. You can change the way you think if you want to change the way you want to feel. If you want to create results in your life, it’s important to examine your thoughts. Do you believe in yourself on a regular basis? Or not? You can find out through writing in your journal. You need to be aware of how you feel about yourself and if you’re affirming these thoughts.
Acknowledge your thoughts and validate what you want. Even by writing a note on your computer about positive thoughts or goals you want to achieve will reaffirm these ideas as part of your daily routine.
The future doesn’t exist, the past is gone, so the most important and valuable thing we have is the present. Choose on what you want to focus on. Do you want to focus on the bad or the good? Focus on what you have versus what you don’t have.
I promise I’ll get into clothing, colors, what looks good on your silhouette and more in my next blogs. I just wanted to set the foundation of our journey together and tell you that everything comes from the inside first. The way you feel is going to determine how you act.
Remember, I was self-conscience about being short and shy. Now, I learned to appreciate my height. The contest helped me, but I had to help myself first before the contest.
To think is to create, and if you want to feel great you have to change the way you think.
Thank you for reading and keeping up to date on my blogs, and of course thank you for being apart of my social media channels 🙂
(Photo credit to amazing fashion photographer Victor Malado)
– Ximena Valero